know i need you more

[notapaladin]

Teomitl wants Acatl to wreck him. Acatl is gentle, considerate, and perfectly capable of pleasing his lover at his own, slower pace.

Teomitl very quickly decides he likes that better.

-

They’ve been tangled together on Acatl’s mat for hours, trading long slow kisses, when Teomitl finds his courage and wakes it up.

“I love you,” he whispers into the space between their mouths, and his heart hammers fit to escape his ribs entirely. Because it’s true, of course it’s true, and he’s said it before—but he’s never said it like this, with Acatl half on top of him and the long lines of his body like a brand, with hands in each other’s hair and a leg nudging his thighs apart. The sun has long since set, but he knows that he won’t be going home to his own mat tonight if he can avoid it. I love you. I want more.

Acatl kisses him again, stealing the air from his lungs. “I know,” he breathes. “I love you, too.”

His face burns, as it does every time Acatl says it. It’s the tone, he thinks—softly reverent, the tone of a man who’s seen him at his very worst and still somehow wants him. “Acatl,” he huffs, and lowers his head; it’s easier to cover his own embarrassment if he’s mouthing at his lover’s throat, drawing a delicious noise of pleasure from him.

And oh, Acatl is responsive. Teomitl had thought he would be shy at first; after all, he’d been celibate for years, and it can’t be easy to set aside his vows no matter how in love he is. There is certainly some of that—he blushes so deeply whenever a particularly loud noise escapes him, and he’d asked more than once if Teomitl was sure about lighting the torches—but no, he’s simply reserved. Teomitl remembers the saying about still water running deep and thrills to discover just how deep they run here.

He scrapes his teeth lightly over his lover’s pulse and is rewarded with a long roll of his hips that presses his thigh against the growing bulge in his loincloth; when he groans at the stimulation, Acatl skims a hand down his flank in a way that has him shuddering. “You feel so good against me,” he murmurs into Teomitl’s ear. “Mmm...I don’t want to stop.”

His breath catches in his throat for a moment. “Then don’t.” Acatl’s thigh is right there, and even with the cloth in the way he’s pretty sure he could get off just with that, grinding against him until he comes. But that’s not what he wants, not tonight.

Acatl draws back, flushed. “You mean...?”

He licks his lips. Gods, Acatl is gorgeous in the torchlight. “Fuck me.”

Acatl’s eyes go wide, and for a moment he’s afraid that he’s misjudged. That Acatl doesn’t want to go that far, doesn’t want to finally shatter his cracked vows, that even though he loves him and might not mind what they’ve done already he doesn’t want to—

Then Acatl lunges, pinning him down on the mat, and kisses him so ferociously that it sends a shockwave down to his bones. Even when he breaks the kiss, it’s only to breathe, “Gods, yes,” before dropping his mouth to his throat and oh gods if Teomitl had thought the kiss was a shock, the sensation of Acatl’s hot, wet mouth moving against every sensitive spot on his neck is an entire lightning storm. He grabs a handful of Acatl’s thick hair at the first faint suggestion of teeth, back arching in a desperate search for more.

“More,” he pants. “More, gods, Acatl-tzin—”

Acatl’s hips jerk, and now Teomitl realizes he’s not the only one that’s hard. His lover’s voice comes out in a hiss. “Patience.”

A hot tongue slides over his collarbone, and he keens low in his throat. His skin feels like it’s on fire; his cock is throbbing, and when he rolls his hips again it makes his lover actually growl as they press together. He can feel the vibrations of it against his skin and all the way down to his toes. “Acatl.”

Acatl lifts his head, searching his face as though he’s actually unsure, as though Teomitl hasn’t made his wishes quite clear. “You really want this? With me?”

Teomitl sucks in a hard breath. His blood feels like it’s boiling under his skin; he can’t help but wriggle, grinding against Acatl’s cock until the hand fiddling with his belt grips his hip tight enough to make him gasp. “Yes, yes, please.” He’s dreamed about this for months, since long before their first soft kiss, and the realization that he’s finally going to have it has him almost frantic.

Acatl bites his lip for a moment, looking thoughtful, and then he draws back to sit between his spread legs. “...Then let me set the pace.”

For a long moment he just looks at him. Just when Teomitl’s starting to squirm under the attention and is kind of hoping Acatl will rip his clothes off, careful hands go to his loincloth and slowly, slowly undo the knot. He exhales. Oh.

When he reaches to help, his lover lightly bats his hands away, and so he can only wriggle out of the cloth and shiver appreciatively at the spark in Acatl’s eyes when he sees him bare. It’s not the first time they’ve been naked in front of each other, but every time the expression on his lover’s face is something close to awe. Acatl’s voice softens. “You’re lovely.”

You don’t own a mirror, Teomitl thinks fondly. Acatl is stripping just as carefully, laying his loincloth aside, and the sight is glorious. Torchlight sinks into his midnight hair and turns his skin gold; as slender as he is, his half-hard cock looks mouthwateringly thick between his thighs. Teomitl has to swallow a few times before he can manage words, feeling a tremor of anticipation start somewhere low in his gut. Gods, I want him inside me. “So are you.”

“Biased,” Acatl mutters fondly.

And then he’s touching him. A hand slides slow and firm down his inner thigh, and Teomitl opens his legs to put himself on display. Please, he thinks, but he can’t say it because Acatl’s palm is scorching hot on the soft skin there, and when he opens his mouth the only thing that comes out is a moan. He’s leaking already, before Acatl has even touched his cock; when he actually does, smooth fingers wrapping around it and rubbing his thumb lightly over the slit, Teomitl bucks into it with a wordless cry.

Acatl doesn’t rush. He just pumps him leisurely a few times, as though he has all the time in the world, as though Teomitl isn’t writhing under his ministrations. “Mmm. I can’t believe all this is for me.”

He sucks in a shaky breath and wills himself back under control, digging his nails into his palms until they sting. He wants to grab Acatl and pull him on top of him, wants to beg for him to hurry up, but he refrains. There’s something about this moment that feels too important to rush. Acatl’s dark eyes are even darker where they rest on him, as though he’s something precious. “You should get used to it,” he whispers. “I’m not going anywhere.”

Acatl smiles at him, soft and sweet. “I know.”

Those lovely, talented hands leave him, and for a moment he feels bereft. Oh, he thinks, what are you— but then Acatl’s reaching into a wicker chest and unstoppering a jar of oil, and he knows. He’s pretty sure he actually whimpers, cock twitching hopefully. When oil-slick fingers trail down his thigh again, he arches and lets his legs fall open wider. “Please.”

“Don’t worry.” Acatl’s voice is as calm and steady as ever, but the heat in his eyes is scorching. He slides his fingers over Teomitl’s balls; the chill of the liquid on such a sensitive spot makes him shudder all over, but his lover doesn’t linger for long. “I’ll take care of you.”

One finger presses against his hole, and he gasps as it slides in. “That’s—oh.” Not unpleasant, but...strange. He’s toyed with himself a few times, but it’s nothing like having someone else’s fingers there. There’s a little resistance, but not enough to be painful.

Acatl is watching his face. It makes him flush and avert his eyes, suddenly almost unable to bear being the subject of such keen focus. A firm hand comes to rest on the inside of his knee, holding his thighs apart, and oh, that shouldn’t be arousing but it is; there’s a bone-deep and tremorous relief in knowing that Acatl is in control. His voice is a low rumble that makes Teomitl shiver. “Relax for me.”

“I won’t break so easily...oh. Oh!” That’s because that finger has pressed in further, up to the knuckle, and at first it just feels pleasantly full but then Acatl draws back slightly and presses in again at an angle that hits something deep inside him, something that sends a coil of liquid lightning lashing up his spine and makes him claw helplessly at the mat. For a split second he can’t breathe, can barely think past the shock of do that again, but before he can voice it Acatl is anticipating his desires and the next thrust makes him arch with a breathless keen.

Even with his eyes squeezed shut in a vain attempt to deal with the building pleasure, he can hear the smile in his lover’s voice. “Enjoying yourself?”

“Nnnnhhhyes.” He’s honestly amazed he can even get that much out; Acatl’s not stopping, and with every little movement he swears he can feel himself being reshaped. He thinks about Acatl’s cock, and some inner muscles flex in a way that sends a mini surge of heat through him and makes Acatl suck in a breath. It’s not enough. “Nn—please...”

There’s a low, almost smug hum. “More?”

“Yes please,” he gasps, and then there’s a second finger pressing in alongside the first. Now it’s a real stretch, almost aching, but even the pain is sweet. “Acatl-tzin,” he begins, but whatever he’s going to plead for—more or harder or fill me up—is erased, because then Acatl starts working him open in earnest and he can’t form words even within his own head. He thought he’d been reshaped earlier? Hah. He didn’t know what that felt like. Acatl is stretching him open, fingers curling and pumping inside him, and he can only buck his hips roughly in a vain attempt to establish a rhythm. If his lover keeps this up, he’s going to scream; as it is, he can’t hold back his open-mouthed whimpers each time Acatl hits the right spot.

Acatl’s not unaffected. The grip on his knee is almost hard enough to bruise, and when Teomitl’s eyes flutter open he feels a jolt of arousal at the molten heat in his lover’s gaze. “Gods,” Acatl breathes, “I wish you could see yourself right now. You look incredible. I,”—his fingers curl, scattering Teomitl’s thoughts to the four winds and making him clench down with a gasp of pleasure—“cannot wait to make love to you.”

“Please.” He’s trembling. Even with two fingers in him, he just feels so full. He can’t imagine how it’ll feel with Acatl’s cock in him. “Duality, Acatl, don’t wait anymore.”

“...Alright.”

He’s prepared for those fingers to slip out of him, but not for how empty it makes him feel; his hips jerk, and a desperate little cry escapes him before he bites his lip to stifle the next one. For an instant he’s tightening on nothing, and then Acatl is finally, finally leaning over him and bracing himself with an elbow on the mat and a long, unhurried kiss. “Breathe,” he murmurs.

Acatl’s other hand is on his hip, and it’s the most natural thing in the world to wrap his legs around his waist. The most natural thing in the world, too, to arch his back and roll his hips, feeling that thick, hard cock nudge against him. They’re almost close enough to kiss in this position, and he wants to—but he wants to get fucked more. He meets Acatl’s eyes with a shaky grin. “C’mon.” Come on. I can take it.

And then Acatl sinks into him in one smooth thrust, and his mouth falls open. He wanted Acatl to fill him, and he’s getting his wish; Acatl’s cock is hitting places inside him he hadn’t known existed, never mind knowing that it would feel so good, and the way Acatl huffs out a growling little breath and squeezes his eyes shut as though it’s just as overwhelming for him too has Teomitl gasping and squirming, digging his nails into his shoulderblades. It’s all so much. Acatl’s holding himself still, letting him adjust to the girth of him, but it’s not—he wants—

Shuddering, he pants into Acatl’s ear, “Gods, wreck me.”

Acatl inhales sharply and draws back, holding his gaze. For being buried in him to the hilt, hot and hard as stone inside him, his voice is remarkably steady...but oh, his eyes burn. “I love you. I’m going to treat you the way you deserve.”

He still isn’t moving. Teomitl rocks his hips unconsciously, trembling with what just isn’t enough stimulation, and gasps, “So?” It means something, he knows, each time Acatl says he loves him; at any other time it would strike him right in the heart, but right now the only body parts he cares about are a good bit lower down. When he shifts in just the right way, his cock rubs maddeningly lightly against Acatl’s stomach.

Another wriggle, and Acatl makes a small, hitched sound and tightens his grip on Teomitl’s hips. “Maybe,” he gasps. “Maybe. One day. But not tonight, love. Tonight...let’s take things slowly.”

Love. His face burns all over again; Acatl’s called him that before, but never in this tone of voice, never sounding reverent and ravenous all at once. “Acatl,” he says, and splays open a hand on his back. He can feel his heartbeat through his skin, through every place where they’re connected. “Please.”

Then his lover is rocking forward smoothly, and he forgets all thoughts of being wrecked because this slow sweet lovemaking is better than anything else he’s ever experienced before. It’s not just that he’s full of him; it’s that each thrust is at the perfect angle to add to his pleasure, sliding smoothly past that spot that makes his toes curl, and it’s easy—so easy—for him to respond. His hips roll all on their own, pulling Acatl back in every time he withdraws, and when Acatl licks into his mouth his moan reverberates through them both.

“Mmm...” Oh, he thinks, this is wonderful—but then Acatl’s mouth lowers to his throat, and he can’t think anything at all. As gentle as Acatl is being with the rest of his body, he’s always just a little ruthless here; there are teeth scraping lightly over his throat again, a wet mouth slowly sucking a bruise into his collarbone, and before he knows it he’s bucking his hips hard, trying to urge him on.

Acatl is patient. He’s always patient, and generally Teomitl thinks it’s one of his better qualities. But right now, with the pace of his thrusts not varying so much as a heartbeat, it’s going to drive him mad. When his lover sets his mouth just at the junction of neck and shoulder, his entire body jolts, and he claws at his back with a cry of his name. “Acatl-tzin...!”

There’s a rough, breathy growl from him, and then he pulls at Teomitl’s hip and oh, that opens him up wider, makes some inner muscles squeeze reflexively, and the next slide inward hits something that has Teomitl keening and jerking under him. “So good,” Acatl gasps, “Gods, my strong warrior, you’re so good for me, you feel perfect...”

“Acatl.” He hadn’t known it could be like this. Nothing he’d ever heard, no salacious rumors from his peers or frank instruction from the priests of Xochipilli, had ever prepared him for the knowledge now racing through him, that sweet words from the man he loves can melt his heart even as each thrust makes his blood sing. It’s still not what he’d imagined—he’d expected something rough, something that would leave an impact he’d feel for days—but he’s almost speechless from how good it feels.

He can still think of something that would make it better. A few more of those long, slow thrusts, and he shudders and pants, “Acatl, gods, touch me.” Even getting that much out is a struggle.

But his lover hears him. The hand at his hip lifts to slide between them, taking his cock in a sure grip, and as he cries out Acatl starts stroking him. It’s not very coordinated given how he’s still focused on fucking into him, but it doesn’t have to be; just the hot slide of that calloused palm against his shaft is enough to have sparks racing up Teomitl’s spine. Actual tears gather in the corners of his eyes.

He’s not going to last. He’s not—he closes his eyes, meeting each steady push of Acatl’s cock, and digs his nails into his lover’s shoulders just to have something to hang on to. Lightning is coiling low in his gut, and he knows that if Acatl keeps doing exactly what he’s doing he’s going to come. A scattered thought whirls through what’s left of his mind—so much for a warrior’s stamina. “Love,” he gasps, “Acatl, please—I’m—”

“Let go for me,” Acatl grits out. “I’ve got you.” Now, finally, he’s picking up the pace, and the storm under Teomitl’s skin is building into something devastating.

Let go, Acatl’s telling him. He does. He doesn’t have a choice, not with the way Acatl’s so utterly focused on his pleasure. He can feel it building and building, and then Acatl gives his cock one last stroke and his release surges through his veins like a summer storm or the rising tide, sharp white-edged ecstasy that has him clenching around him with a scream. Thought vanishes; for a small eternity, there’s only roiling, shuddering pleasure erasing all else.

Then with a grunt and a few hard, quick thrusts Acatl is coming too, and oh—oh, he hadn’t realized he’d be able to feel it, hadn’t realized he’d be able to feel Acatl’s cock pulsing along with the aftershocks of his own orgasm as his lover comes deep inside him. An incoherent noise escapes him, still caught in the grips of his own arousal; all he can do is shudder and take it, feeling incomparably full.

As he comes down from that peak, the sensation of Acatl softening inside him is almost overstimulating. He buries his face in Acatl’s shoulder, only belatedly realizing his lover is trembling too. Wanting to soothe him and unable to speak—his mind is stuffed with unspun cotton—he strokes down Acatl’s spine, carding his fingers through his hair. Love you. Fuck, I love you so much.

Acatl slowly relaxes, panting breaths evening out, and then he huffs and pulls out and wow, he can feel that as well, and it’s definitely too much; he gasps, grabbing a fistful of Acatl’s hair, and his lover pets his flank in a wordless little apology. “I’m just going to clean us up,” he murmurs.

Teomitl mumbles something in return. He doesn’t want to move. Luckily, he doesn’t have to; Acatl leaves his side only long enough to grab a clean cloth, and then all Teomitl has to do is lay back and let him work. Even this is gentle, and he finds himself smiling. Acatl always takes such good care of him.

Acatl notices, of course, and when they’re both less sticky he leans in to steal a kiss that has Teomitl humming in pleasure before he pulls away. “Did you enjoy that?”

“Mmmngh.” Oh, words are still hard. He reaches for Acatl instead, coaxing him to lay with his head on his shoulder. It doesn’t take much; his lover is always wonderfully inclined towards holding him in moments like this. He strokes Acatl’s back and the thick waves of his hair and thinks very loudly I love you.

Acatl quirks up a teasing smile. “Was that a yes?”

He snorts. Where love won’t unstop his tongue, Acatl’s dry tone can always manage. “Wasn’t it obvious?”

“Mmm.” Acatl leans up, pressing a brief, soft kiss to his mouth. Even when he breaks it, propping himself up on one elbow, they’re so close that their noses touch and he goes a bit cross-eyed keeping him in focus. “I suppose it was. But you can’t blame me for being concerned. It was my first time on this particular battlefield.”

Your first, but it’s definitely not going to be your last if I have anything to say about it. He strokes Acatl’s cheek, feeling the soft skin get warmer under his touch. The torches are too low to tell, but he’s almost sure his lover is blushing. It’s adorable; once again he feels like his heart is made of something soft and yielding, melting like sap under a flame. “That was...you were...incredible,” he whispers.

Acatl smiles at him, shy now. “I’m glad. I know what you said, but I...”

He leans in, bumping noses and startling a quiet huff of amusement out of his lover. Joy bubbles up in his own heart, and he knows he’s grinning like a fool. “You love me?”

“Yes,” Acatl says simply. “You deserve to be treated well.”

Now it’s his turn to blush. Knowing your own worth is one thing; having it affirmed by the man you love is entirely different. And he’s never...no one’s ever meant it like that. He knows what Acatl’s said, and it’s far more than those simple, matter-of-fact words. I love you, so I’ll treat you gently. I love you, so I’ll treat you as a handful of quetzal feathers, a precious jade. I love you, so I’ll treat you well. It makes his heart race all over again, and he has to fight a completely undignified urge to bury his face in his hands. “I—Acatl!”

Acatl is entirely unrepentant. “You asked. I answered.”

He has to kiss him for that, and they don’t go to sleep for a very long time.